What the %@*#?! Wednesday, Week 6

The other day, I came downstairs after nursing Beauty to sleep and found the little Beast crouched on the floor between the couch and the coffee table. He had his back to me, and was looking wide-eyed over his shoulder at me, trying to appear innocent and inconspicuous. I instantly demanded to know what he was up to, and approached him to find the item below possesively clutched to his chest.



That is a bottle of Spiderman gummy vitamins. With a child proof, twist-to-unlock lid. And yes, it is empty. Because he ate them. All of them.



What the @%*#?! Is the little Beast some kind of evil genius? Do you know how much intense concentration and coordination it must have taken for him to pull off such a feat?! First he had to climb his way to the countertop by wrapping his freaky monkey toes around these tiny knobs. Ouch!



Then he had to stand on that ice-cold granite slab barefoot and streeeeetch to reach the bottle of vitamins on the top shelf of this cupboard, without toppling over and crashing to the ground.





Then, he had to figure out how to outsmart the childproof cap and devour the dozen remaining vitamins, all without making enough noise to alarm me. And he had to accomplish this in a matter of minutes before I could return and foil his plot. If we could just teach our precocious child to use his superpowers for good instead of evil, I believe he may be capable of single-handedly resolving the economic crisis or bringing peace to the Middle East. But, alas, I fear he finds troublemaking more fun than peacemaking...

For better and more fun What the @%*#?! Wednesday posts, visit here, here, here or here!